COMMITTED ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS
Text: Interpersonal Communication: Everyday Encounters,
Julia T. Wood
Read Chapter 11, Committed Romantic Relationships
We made it to the end of our text. This last chapter is an important one. Some of you in our class are in committed relationships; others are seeking one. I have been in a committed relationship for 23 years, and I must say that each year it gets better! I hope this last chapter gives you insight into the mystery and power of a committed relationship.
Some of my favorite books to read (for your spare time:}) on committed relationships are John Welwood, Love and Awakening: Discovering the Sacred Path of Intimate Relationships, Hal and Sidra Stone, Embracing Each Other: Relationship as Teacher, Healer & Guide, and Gay and Kathlyn Hendricks, Conscious Loving. I hope, if you are interested in a truly wonderful committed relationship, that you will read these books some day.
In the meantime, I want to thank each of you for your commitment to the relationships we have formed in this class, both online and together in the classroom. I always learn so much about myself and life in general when I enter into a ten-week learning experience with others. I am truly grateful for the experience. I wish you the very best in your days ahead. May communication be a tool that serves you well on your journey!
Here's an excerpt from a poem I'd like to share with you as we complete our time together. It was written by the Persian philosopher, Kahlil Gibran who lived from 1883-1931. It is part of a collection of poems from The Prophet, one of the most highly read books in the world:
Love has no other desire but to fulfill
But if you love and must needs have desires,
let these be your desires:
To melt and be like a running brook that sings
its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for
another day of loving; to rest at the noon hour
and meditate love's ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude;
and then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved
in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.
Check here for any new messages from me.
FINAL LEARNING QUIZ:
Copy this quiz and email your responses to me:
1. Watch the movie Sleepless in Seattle. What does this film say about romantic relationships? What are the fears and challenges about co-commitment that are expressed in this film?
2. There are many types of co-committed relationships. In the United States, in particular, the gay and lesbian community has worked hard to help heterosexuals understand their lifestyle. Write about your experience of understanding the different types of co-committed relationships. If you know someone who is gay or lesbian, ask them to help you in developing a greater understanding of their relationships. What did you learn?
As a way to end our class, I ask that you fill out the final self evaluation form which can be emailed to me. In your final evaluation, you will be evaluating yourself on the goals you set for yourself at the beginning of the class, your learning objectives and measurable outcomes, as well as how well you keep your commitment to the tasks of this learning experience. Your evaluation, together with mine, will determine your final grade.
As a part-time instructor, I am required each quarter to have my class evaluated by my students. I believe this is an important part of the trust between teachers and students -- that you have the freedom and right to say how this experience impacted you, both positively and negatively. Therefore, I would like you to write a letter to my dean, Edith Wollin ("Dear Edith Wollin"), and comment on the following:
|Your general comments about the class;|
|What you liked best about the class;|
|What you liked least about the class;|
|What you would or would not change about the class;|
|General comments about the instructor.|
Please email your responses to her directly. Thank you. You do not have to put your name on the letter if you wish it to be confidential.
FINAL SELF EVALUATIONS (please copy and email your evaluation to the me. Final evaluation are due no later than June 16th.)
|What was your learning plan for this course? What were
the goals, learning objectives, and measurable outcomes that you set up for yourself in
this class? Describe in detail these goals, the tools and strategies you used to
meet them, and whether or not you believe you successfully met your communication goals.
Evaluate yourself by giving yourself a grade. Did you give yourself the grade you
set for yourself at the beginning of the quarter? If so, why? If not, why not?|
As one way of evaluating yourself, please retake the communication skills test (from Week #1) and comment on your results compared to the first time you took it.
|Select one component of this course on interpersonal
communication (i.e., listening, gender communication, conflict communication, emotional
intelligence, the discussion rooms, chat rooms, final group project) and write at least
three paragraphs about this aspect of communication and why you found it helpful in
improving your own communication skills and style.|
|At North Seattle Community College, we are very interested in
obtaining data from students about the difference between online course and an on-campus
course, especially as it relates to speech courses. Please write about the
difference, as you experienced it, in communicating online versus in class. Which do
you prefer? Which is a richer experience? Why? How have the skills and
theories you have learned in this class affected the way you speak to another person face
to face or online? |
|Do you believe you would have benefited more from this class
if you had taken it in a classroom? Why or why not? What was the most
difficult part of taking this class online? Would you recommend it to
others? Why or why not?|
|There were many components of this class as both an online
and a distributed learning class: keeping up with your reading, participating in
weekly discussion rooms, sending in your learning quizzes on time, attendance at the three
Saturday classes, participating in a weekly chat room, and researching an interpersonal
communication topic and presenting it to the class. What did you find helpful as a
learning device? What was not helpful? How would you like the course to be
changed to better achieve your learning goals?|
|What was the most important thing you learned through this
speech class? How will you utilize this knowledge to create more effective
relationships, both at home and at work?|
|Once all your work has been submitted, let me know about a
time that we can get together (either in person or online if a time cannot be arranged) to
talk about your learning goals, objectives, and outcomes and evaluate the success of your
plan. We will talk about the quality of your self reflection in your weekly communication
journals, assess together your ability to demonstrate critical thinking in response to the
questions posed each week regarding our the text, evaluate your participation in the
weekly chat and discussion rooms, talk about your learning in the final group project, and
finally, look at your participation in all three Saturday skill-building
order to receive an "A" for this course (4.0-3.5), you must fully demonstrate
competency in the four course goals through successfully meeting all your learning
objectives and measurable outcomes as outlined in your strategic plan. If you wish
to receive a "B" for this course (3.4 - 2.5), you must demonstrate competency in
three of the four course goals through the successful completion of your learning
objectives. To receive a "C" (2.4-1.5), you must meet your learning
objectives for two of the course goals; for a "D" (1.4-.7), you must meet your
learning objectives for one of the course goals. To not meet any of the course goals
is to fail the class.
Thanks for your participation in this course. Together we have all learned a great deal about what makes for effective interpersonal communication -- online and face to face. Have a great summer! Jane
FINAL DISCUSSION ROOM
check here for a final topic of discussion.